Dad of Divas: June 2009

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 30: Get a Straight Razor Shave

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to Get a Straight Razor Shave.

I can honestly say that I have never had this type of shave. I actually do not get to an actual barbershop much as J-Mom will cut my hair and it saves our house some money overall. In reading what Brett has to say though about this, it sounds intriguing, and something that I would like to experience at least once in my life.

My only question about this is whether it makes a difference if you are usually clean shaven or not as for me, I shave with both an electronic and manual razor daily which leaves little behind. Maybe this does not make much of a difference. For those of you who have had this done to you, what are your thoughts on this question?

My thanks to Brett for taking me and others on this 30 day journey. Some of the things were quite easy, while others took some thought and work, like all good programs should. If you haven't started on this 30 day journey, I highly recommend it, check it out today!

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30 Days to a Better Man-Day 29: Conquer a Fear

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to Conquer a Fear.

I had to think about this one for a bit to see what I wanted to conquer and I am still unsure to as what it is that I want to attack. There are not a lot of true fears that I can think of. I mean, I am not afraid of heights, open spaces, spiders....

I am afraid of losing my family, even though I know that this will probably not happen. This is one that I think I will work on trying to set back further in my consciousness. I have a fear not accomplishing enough and not making a difference. This may sound strange, but I truly want to leave my mark on this world, and I do not want to leave this life without knowing that I have done what I could to make a difference on my community, my family and the others around me.

How do I alleviate this, I have to say that I am a bit at a loss right now, but I am going to ponder this some more and see what I can come up with. What do all of you think? How would you attack this fear?

Project 365 (227/365) - Dad & Diva-PJ

Dad&Diva-PJ, originally uploaded by dadofdivas.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Project 365 (226/365) - And She's Off...

Sunday, June 28, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 28: Write a Love Letter

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to Write a Love Letter.

J-Mom, today I write to you to thank you on our anniversary for the past 11 years of wedded bliss that you have given me. We have grown both closer as friends and continue to learn more and more about each other which bonds us and helps us to further the love that we have for each other.

It is hard to believe that when I walked you down the path at Asylum Lake with my voice gone and me fighting bronchitis, that 13 years later we would be together with two wonderful girls living in a place and being in a place where we are happy and feeling like our lives are moving in the right direction. I think I can honestly say that I would not have known what direction life would have taken us, but it has been a ride that I would not trade with anyone, and you have been the best of partners to share the experience with. Actually there is no one else that I would rather of shared this "ride" with.

I still have to say that I find myself in awe of the person that you are. Each day I am amazed at how lucky I am to have married such a beautiful, smart woman. I continue to find myself weak in the knees around you as I did when we first started dating each other, and I have to thank you for that!

There are so many things that I love about you. Some of the things you probably would guess, but there are others that might surprise you. I love the fact that you are the most beautiful woman that I have ever met. I love the way the divas adore you and always want more. I love being able to relax and be just me around you. I love the fact that you always listen and are present, caring and supportive in all that I do. I love that you share your gifts with our girls. I even love your cold toes, especially on a warm night. There are so many things that I love about you, and the lists just continues to grow as the years continue on.

We have been through a lot together, and have had both good and bad times, but I have come to rely on you as my best friend and confidant and my barometer for things that I should do in my personal and professional life. I appreciate so much that I can come to you and know that even though we are not in the same field, I can bring you my concerns for an unbiased view to help guide me!

I will always love you, and I know that our love will continue to grow as the years go by. Thank you for everything that you are and everything that you have become to me and I look forward to the years to come!

Project 365 (225/365) - Extreme Close Up!

Saturday, June 27, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 27: Start a book

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to start a book.

I enjoy both reading and listening to good books - both fiction and non-fiction. At this point I am listening to two audio books, both from The Modern Scholar Series, one on the Life and Times of Benjamin Franklin and one on Islam and the West. Now I know these are divergent topics, but they are both quite interesting and I would recommend this series for anyone! I also am reading Clive Cussler's new novel, Medusa. I have always enjoyed Cusslers' different series for both their adventurous nature and characters that he has built.

I am trying to share this love of reading with my daughters, and we have read to them constantly since they were born. Dive-J loves to read and it is still a bit too early to tell about Diva-PJ, but she does not always have the same amount of interest to sit and listen to a story that Diva-J had at her age, but every child is different, so we will haave to see what happens.

I would also encourage guys to get out there and try and write your own book. I am lucky to be someone who is already a published editor/author. I have to say that it is an amazing feeling to see your name listed on a book that people are buying, but it is a labor of love to do this and is not for the feint of heart. All-in-all though there is a magical aspect to getting your own thoughts on paper and reading them back. Now you may always see ways to make your writing better, but that is ok, and is a positive step in self learning.

So what are you all reading today?

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 26: Take the Marine Corps Fitness Test

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to take the marine corps fitness test.

This was a hard one to accomplish, especially with the amount of time that it takes. I know that this is important, but I have to say that lately I have been having difficulty finding the time to work out. I know if is important as I have already mentioned, but as I have mentioned in my post about Play, when I get home at the end of the day, I find that I want to spend time with my girls and my wife, and not working out. In the morning, I find that I am trying to blog lately. So how do all of you do it? For those of you that have a family, job and still work out, how do you fit it all in?

I have a pull up bar in our basement and can usually do quite a few sets of pull ups. The way that I do pull ups though are different than others. I do a quick pull up and then do an 8 count drop, as a Phys Ed Professor once told me that in doing weights or pull ups that this was the best way to build muscle and to take the most out of these exercises.

I also have been trying to get into a routine of running again. The other day I did a 3 mile run and ended up finishing with about 24.5, which was not the best time that I have ever had, but ok in the sense that I had not run in a while.

I need to get working on push ups, crunches and leg lifts to try and get myself into the best shape that I can.

So what do you do to work out? How do you find time to do this?

Project 365 (224/365) - Happy Anniversary!

J-Mom and I celebrate our 11th Anniversary today! I am so lucky to have such a great friend and mother to our girls in my life!

Friday, June 26, 2009

Picnik - cinemascope flower

cinemascope flower, originally uploaded by dadofdivas.

Tyler over at Building Camelot introduced me to a new site called Picnik. It is a cool site that pulls together a ton of photo editing tools into one site and provides you with the opportunity to practice some tricks of the photography trade in just one click of the mouse.

Tyler is giving away a free 6 month subscription to Picnik. I encourage you all to check this out...we'll see if I win.

Project 365 (223/365) - Talk about a strange way to pet the cat

Thursday, June 25, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 25: Start a Debt Reduction Plan

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to start a debt reduction plan.

I am always working to try and lower our debts. I am not always successful, and we continue to see large educational loan debt that does not seem to get any less (which is frustrating). I always try and pay more than I owe on my loans to work to pay off the loans earlier than the length of the loan, but again, I long to see more results, but they are slow in coming.

I think as humans we crave results, we crave to see things alter in a better direction. It does not always happen, but we still wish for it.

Every now and again I find myself saying, "Maybe I'll win the lotto - but I'll have to buy a ticket first" as a humorous look at the fact that wouldn't it be nice if our financial situation changed for the better, but instead we continue to find ourselves being financially stable, but not moving forward with leaps and bounds like I would want. Yet, I must still say that we are stable and are able to do the things that we want to do, so I guess that is a positive thing, and it is something that I should not be complaining about as there are others that are in a much worse state of affairs.

So today, I am working to come up with other new ideas about how to bring in other money to try and pay down our debt slowly but surely.

How have you done it, what tricks and tips can you share?

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 24: Play

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to play!.

I find myself as a father of girls always playing. I work all day and when I walk in at night I hear "daddy!" and from there it's playtime. Playtime usually consists of rolling around on the floor, tickling matches, playing outside, dancing around the living room, reading stories, and other fun things such as this.

It lightens my heart to set aside the burdens of the world and work to see the world through my kids' eyes. It always amazes me how kids see the world in such a black and white nature and how we get so worked up over some things which kids would see as strange.

So today I challenge all of you as Brett does to get down on the floor and play with a child. How and what do you do to play daily with your child?

Project 365 (223/365) - A light in the darkness

Project 365 (222/365) - Smile!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 23: Learn a Manual Skill

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to learn a manual skill.

To be honest here this one is going to be a bit harder for me than other tasks. I have never been a very skilled individual who works with my hands, besides in gardening and landscaping. This being said, I am always willing to try something new.

I think for me, I would like to learn more about working on my car, or at least knowing what is happening more with my car and how I can mitigate some of these issues with home maintenance.

So for today, I think I will work to try and find some online and library based resources on this topic and see where it leads.

What about you, what type of manual skill will you work on?

Project 365 (221/365) - Birds...Birds...Birds

Monday, June 22, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 22: Improve Your Posture

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to improve your posture.

I have been trying to work on this over the past year or so. As a shorter guy, I cannot afford to be any shorter than I already am so for me, keeping my posture what it is now. I never would have thought about using a string to check my posture, but I think that I may just try this as every little bit helps!

How are you working on your posture?

Saturday, June 20, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 20: Perfom Service

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to perform service.

I have always been one to serve others. Back to high school when I was involved with the Interact Club (Jr. Rotary), and then into College where I worked at soup kitchens and volunteered my time with church and other outside organizations. After college I continued being involved by becoming a Rotarian and giving back to the community that I loved within.

Since moving back to Michigan I have to say that I have not gotten as connected service-wise to my community and I am definitely looking for ways to do this. I have considered becoming a Rotarian again, but finances are tight and this costs money. I may look into something through church uch as Habitat for Humanity as I know they will be working on a house soon. So I know that the task today will not become one that will be finished today.

It is nice though to have a little reminder about what is important and to put things in perspective if you know what I mean.

I am still working on trying to figure out the best way to get my girls to catch on to the importance of serving others and hope that they will learn from my example regarding the importance of giving back as they get older.

How about all of you, how do you perform service?

Project 365 (220/365) - Who is that masked crusader?

Project 365 (219/365) - Good Friends, Good Fathers!

Friday, June 19, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 19: Schedule a Physical Exam

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to schedule a physical exam.

I am lucky on this one as right before I moved back to Michigan I had one of these, and to my happiness, I received a clean bill of health. I always fret about whether the cholesterol levels will come back up but they have been decreasing with the methods that I have been taking: See Why I hate Genetics & Why I hate Genetics (An Update).

I do have to mention that the thought of a colonoscopy just gives me the chills and from what I have heard from those that have to get them (all of us after we turn 40 - so I still have some time), it is not pleasant.

So I will just count my blessings that I am healthy now and we will not dwell on the future and live in the present!

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 18:Find Your N.U.T.S.

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to find your N.U.T.S.

N.U.T.S. stand for: Non-negotiable, Unalterable Terms. These are things that mean so much to you that you would never leave them behind, or you would never change them no matter what happens. Today's challenge is to identify these and live up to them to the best of your ability.

In thinking about this, some of the N.U.T.S. that I find important in my life include:

I am faithful to my wife
I find time to spend with my children and am present during these times
I am honest to those around me
I talk about concerns to people whom they effect and do not let them linger
I welcome and look for feedback
I will admit when I am wrong
I will always be attracted to my wife
I will try to carve out some time for me as often as I can
I will work to put my family first in all situations

These are a few of the things that I can think of, but my list is one that continues to grow.

What about you, what are your N.U.T.S.?

Project 365 (217/365) - Nothing Like Flying Fish

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Project 365 (216/365) - A Toast

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Project 365 (215/365) - A Flowergirl In Training - Anyone in Need?

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 17: Talk to 3 Strangers

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to talk to 3 strangers.

I don't see this as a challenge today as in my job I get to talk to strangers all of the time. In my life as a College Administrator, I get to encounter strangers both in the sense of current and prospective students as well as other guests to campus.

The challenge for me revolves around talking to strangers outside of work. I tend to be find with this at work, but once I get home, I don't go out of my way always to get to know strangers, at least not as much as I do at work.

Don't get me wrong, I am an extrovert and can get out there with the best of them, but sometimes, I just don't seem to go with the flow in the direction if you know what I mean.

The only other challenge that I sometimes run into is in what to talk about. I mean, you can get them talking about themselves, but then beyond that, at times it is hard for me to come up with topics at times to keep the conversation flowing. Mybe it is just me.

I will see who I get to meet today! How about all of you, how do you deal with meeting strangers both personally and professionally?

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 16: Create a Budget

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to create a budget.

For the past few years the Divadom has been running a pseudo budget. What is a pseudo budget you may ask. Well, a pseudo budget is one that allows us to know what our outflow is, but one that we tend to overspend unfortunately and gripe about because we do not always stay in the black.

Since we have moved I have not gotten us in the flow of the budget again, so I am still in the process of getting this up and running again.

So with this one, I need some words of inspiration, because I do this, but we do not always stay within the budget as I mentioned above. Other things come up and we use savings to cover the shortfall. What do all of you do to make your budgets work?

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 15: Make a Meal

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to make a meal.

I have always enjoyed cooking and developing new concoctions with items at hand. Unfortunately, my tastes tend to be a bit different than my family. I tend to enjoy spices and trying new things, while my family tends to be more of a traditional fair type of family, so my creativity sometimes has to take a trip on the blander side (for my taste that is).

Also, with my job the way it is, I tend not to get home until later in the evening, so I tend to have to wait until the weekends to do any cooking unless I am looking to set up a meal ahead of time which isn't always possible.

I will see what I can do to make a meal this week... I tend to like to grill over the summer, so maybe something manly on the grill!

What about you other guys, what do you like to cook?

Project 365 (214/365) - That doesn't look too comfortable!

Monday, June 15, 2009

Project 365 (213/365) - A Wonderful Flower Girl

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 14: Write a letter to your father

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to write a letter to your father.

Where do I start? Thank you for being you and for teaching me many of the things that I have learned and have come to learn as I have become both a husband and a father. You have taught me things that both have shown me what to do and how to act and behave as well as how not to act and behave at times as well.

It is amazing to me that we have come full circle and became friends now as adults. As you and I both know, as I grew up it was Mom that was around while you had to work the long hours. You tried your best, but administrators have to hold long hours, and I now understand this. Yet, as I have become an adult I have become closer to you which has been wonderful. I have come to see you as a regular person, and not as just a father.

Most recently, I have come to learn the lesson that even you can make mistakes and that even fathers are human and can b inherently flawed. I know that I am learning from this most recent experience, and hope that I know what I am learning, but I know that it will become clearer as time goes by.

So how do I thank you for the life that you provided me, the love that you gave me and the skills that you instilled in me? I can honestly say that I do not know. I can only say thank you from the bottom of my heart. I always knew that I was loved, even though there were times that I may have been a bit challenging. I still feel today that this is the case and that I can turn to you with whatever questions, concerns that I may have, and I have to thank you for this.

So thank you for being you, with your positives, negatives, good and bad qualities. I know and appreciate that we have time still together and look forward to the years to come.

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 13: Declutter your life

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to declutter your life.

This task will not be too difficult as I am working on this as we speak. Seeing that we just moved a few months back we were able to definitely declutter our home a bit, having a moving sale and donating a large amount of things so that they did not need to be moved again.

I do have to work on keeping my life uncluttered though. I tend to collect things and J-Mom at times has to get on me to keep things picked up and neat (as we have to do this as well with Diva-J).

Since we had kids I have come to find that we definitely have had a whole new layer/level of clutter adding onto our life. Toys, clothes, pictures, crafts, things continue to multiply (especially as they enter school).

So for me, though I will definitely clean off my work area today and my desk at home, my task is to continue to find other ways to declutter the household in general, not just my life.

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 12: Create Your Bucket List

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to create your bucket list.

In thinking about setting up a bucket list, I have to say that it seems so final, like I am on borrowed time, which I guess I am. As I started to think about this, I realized that there were many things that I hope to still do before I meet my maker. Some of the things that are on my list, at least now, include:

To see all 50 States – I have visited probably at least stepped foot into around 43 of the US States. The States that I still need to step into include: Maine, New Hampshire, Oklahoma, Alaska, Hawaii, Arkansas and Alabama.
Travel outside of the US – The only places I have visited outside of the US include: Mexico, Canada & The United Kingdom – I have a long way to go.
Get elected to public office – I have no clue what type of office this might be… we’ll see.
Read the bible from cover to cover: I have read passages and some sections more than others, but never from cover to cover.
Read/Listen to the great books of literature – I know the topic “great books” is a bit subjective, but there are many books that would be called great that I still have yet to read.
Act on stage again – In high school and college I acted on stage and many stated that I was quite good. Since I have become a professional and a father I have not been able to do this. It would be nice to be able to get back into this.
Act in a movie – Besides personal movies, I have never had the chance to act on the BIG screen (How many of us do), but this would be something that I would love to do, following in the footsteps of some of my high school and college classmates.
Go to all of the US National Parks – The US has so many beautiful national parks that are out there for us to visit and experience. I have had the opportunity to visit some, but there are many others that I would love to visit in my lifetime.
See a show on Broadway – I live vicariously through a few of my friends that live near NYC and go to many of the shows that I could only wish to see. I get my “fix” every year watching the Tony Awards, but someday I hope to bring J-Mom to NYC to take in a show or two.
Share my passion for music with my girls – Help my girls to be able to see the beauty in music no matter how you make it.

These are but a few of the things on my list, as I am working to continue this every day. What about you? What is on your bucket list?

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Project 365 (212/365) - I Dub Thee.....

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Project 365 (211/365) - Time to be a Flowergirl

Friday, June 12, 2009

Project 365 (210/365) - Say Ahhhhhhh

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Project 365 (209/365) - A Future Occupation?

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 11: Give Yourself a Testicular Exam

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to give yourself a testicular exam.

I have always thought that being proactive is much smarter than lying back and waiting. Thus, seeing this today, I can say that I will have no problems accomplishing this task. Yesterday's task I have to be honest and say that I am still working on it.

In an age where cancer is more prevalent and testicular & prostate cancer being ones that are not always detected, it is important that as men we take the steps necessary to self check on a periodic basis. Just like the women around us who have been told to do the same, we are no different.

So guys, today, do the exam and be smarter about your health!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

In The Wee Small Hours Of The Morning

How many of you have sat down in the early morning to write a blog or to read a book, surf the internet or the like? I find that for me, this is one of the most productive times of the day, when my mind is the most awake and I am at my most creative. I also have to say that it is nice to have a quiet house where I can work uninhibited (at least for a short period of time).

This time as I mention though is fleeting and it soon turns into the hustle and bustle of the morning which turns into the work day wheich turns into the evening "dad"routine and then slow down yet again for the evening where things quiet down again.

Thus is the existence of my day, at least on most days. Sometimes there is some outlier, something that is different and a welcome change. Don't get me wrong, I am in no way displeased to what my life is like, but the routine is something of an interesting phenomena that has occurred.

So my question for the day for all of you is what do you do in the wee hours of the morning? Sleep? Work Out? Read? Simply watch and listen to nature? What helps you to wake up and start your energy going each day?

Project 365 (208/365) - I Like Your Hat!

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 10: Memorize “If”

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to memorize Rudyard Kipling's "If".

Memory???? What is that...I have been feeling lately as my memory has been oozing out my ears and unless I write it down I am doomed to forget. So working on this task will definitely be a challenge.

Brett makes some good points about the importance of using your memory such as:

Improved Writing
Increased vocabulary
A more interesting personality
a strengthened backbone

(go to the original article for more details...)

So for today I will stretch my brain juice a little further and see if I can work on memorizing this poem... as I said it will not be easy, but that has never meant that it should not be done.

“If”

By: Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream–and not make dreams your master,
If you can think–and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings–nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And–which is more–you’ll be a Man, my son!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Loyalty and Manliness

I am going to go out on a limb today to make an analogy. They call dogs, mans best friend. I personally do not and have never owned a dog, but from an outsiders perspective, I think I can see this. Any person that I have ever know who has owned a dog has always been able to tell me stories where their dog has done things out of the ordinary to remain by their "masters" ide when they need them. Talk about loyalty!

As humans I wish we all could be this loyal. I mean, wouldn't it be quite the world to be able to know that no matter what you could always count on the person you trust the most to always do the right thing and stand by your side? Unfortunately for us, there is a thing called emotions and feelings that tend to cloud human judgment and sometimes interferes with the loyalty that we should be portraying to others and to our children.

For me, as a father, I hope that my children will always be able to see me as loyal to my friends and family, unwaveringly so. I am not for certain at the best way to show this to them, but my best guess is that through actual actions they will learn the most.

So what is loyalty? Dictionary.com lists it as:

–noun, plural -ties.

1. the state or quality of being loyal; faithfulness to commitments or obligations.

2. faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc.

3. an example or instance of faithfulness, adherence, or the like: a man with fierce loyalties.
Origin:
1350–1400; ME loialte <>See loyal, -ty ²

Synonyms:
2. fealty, devotion, constancy. Loyalty, allegiance, fidelity all imply a sense of duty or of devoted attachment to something or someone. Loyalty connotes sentiment and the feeling of devotion that one holds for one's country, creed, family, friends, etc. Allegiance applies particularly to a citizen's duty to his or her country, or, by extension, one's obligation to support a party, cause, leader, etc. Fidelity implies unwavering devotion and allegiance to a person, principle, etc.

I like when you see things like "devotion" and "allegiance: here as I think they stand out and are telling to what loyalty really means.

In growing up as a child, I can remember being fiercely loyal to some of my friends, to the extent where I would stand up for them if they needed me to. Also, a true test of friendship as a child is looking to see who will stand up for you when the time warrants it.

So, my question for the day today to all of you is how do you remain loyal and how do you teach this to others and especially to your children (if you have them).

Look forward to hearing your responses.

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 9: Take a Woman On A Date

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to take a woman on a date.

This one will not be the easiest for us, as alone time as a parent with young children is not always the easiest. Luckily for us, we have my parents coming to town this week and they have generously offered to watch the kids so that we can do just this! It has been a while since we have been on an official date so this will be a nice change of pace.

Have any of you noticed how much going on dates changes when you get married and have kids. Not that I want it to, but what you talk about, as well as the time you actually take when you are out changes. I hope to be able to change this, as I think that once you start going down this path it is a slippery slope.

What are your thoughts on the perfect date? What do you do to whisk your woman off her feet?

Project 365 (207/365) - Summertime Friends

Monday, June 8, 2009

Project 365 (206/365) - New Friends

Guest Posting Again

I am guest posting again over at Discovering Dad about Making Friends Like A Man - Hope you will come over and check it out!

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 8: Start a Journal

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to start a journal.

Over the years I have kept written journals to talk about what I was thinking at the time, what a trip was like, poems, to do lists, etc. As I have gotten older I have found that I have moved away from this, but I still have tried to start things up and dabble in the journal writing once again. I actually started this blog as a journal on parenting and as a glimpse for my girls as to what their father was thinking about while they were growing up.

The challenge I have found is time, time to write in it, just like time to write on my blog as you are reading today. I tend to write in this at 5:30 in the morning while the house is quiet and when I am not getting ready for work (at least not yet). I could be working out right now, I could even be sleeping, but instead I would rather share my thoughts with others and leave some lasting remembrance to my thoughts.

So I will again try and start something of a journal as a legacy for my kids. I love the memoir that Brett's Grandfather left his family...maybe I could someday have something like this. I think that this is a great thing that any grandparent can leave their family as it is a window to their soul and their lives.

So what about it folks. How about starting with me on this journey to share your thoughts through the starting of a journal...

I look forward to your thoughts!

Sunday, June 7, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 7: Reconnect With An Old Friend

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to reconnect with an old friend.

This task for me shouldn't be too difficult as for those who know me, they probably also know that I am pretty good at working to stay in touch with family and friends. Sometimes this even makes J-Mom question me as I will sometimes work on friendships even when the reciprocation is not shown in return and the effort is one-sided. I still feel that it is important for me to keep connected with friends through email, phone, letter and even facebook. I say the last one lightly as Brett mentions that a pack of wild dogs will be unleashed if we try to connect with an old friend via Twitter.

So for me today's task should not be too difficult and actually I am doing this in person today as we set up a few days ago a get together from friends who we have not seen in years. So without even knowing that Brett was going to task us with this, I am living it in real life.

So what about all of you, who can you reconnect with today?

Look forward to your thoughts!

Project 365 (205/365) - Watch Out Dad!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Project 365 (204/365) - Sleeping Beauties

Friday, June 5, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 6: Update Your Resume

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to update their resume.

Brett provides us with seven great tips to get us started toward a strong resume. I would encourage all of you to check it out.

I am a bit lucky on this one as I just started a new job in the past couple of months so my resume/vita is actually in pretty good shape. The only thing that I know that I will need to do is keep it updated with the new responsibilities of my current job as one of the things that can make you really get behind is if you fail to stay on top of it and then find yourself in a situation where you need your resume and need it now.

So my advice to all of you is to stay on top of it and make changes slowly as you learn and do new things, it will definitely make your life a heck of a lot easier in the long run.

Saying this though I still plan to go and check out my resume this morning to see where I am at with everything!

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 5: Cultivate Your Gratitude

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to cultivate your gratitude.

As a part of this you have to accomplish 2 tasks for the day:

1) Identify 10 things that you are grateful for - leaving the surface things behind and thinking deep.

2) Contact and show your gratitude to three people in the next day - going deeper than the surface and really doing something meaningful.

For me when I think about this, the things I am grateful for are:

1) That I have a wife who daily can have the patience to deal with the craziness that the divadom can bring without letting it overcome and overwhelm her too much.

2) Being able to wake up every day knowing that I have a family who loves me, a job that fulfills me and a life that sustains me.

3) Coming home from work and having the Divas come and throw their arms around me and give me kisses (those are the good days).

4) The sound of birds in the morning welcoming the coming of the dawn.

5) Music that draws you in, takes you back and makes you truly understand and feel connected to the artist.

6) Parents who have supported me in good and bad times and have become more than parents, but friends.

7) Being able to wake up daily knowing that I am healthy and not having to worry about the medical ills that effect some.

8) Having opportunities to truly be present with friends, whether reconnecting after a short or long period of time. Also being able to understand the importance of friendships and how one must truly work to maintain and build the friendships to make them last.

9) Seeing my kids learn and grow and know that they have the world ahead of them and that doors are wide open for them to access for their future success.

10) The educational opportunities that I have been afforded. I know there are many who could only dream of receiving a doctorate degree and I was lucky enough to be able to receive mine.

Project 365 (203/365) - What a Hat!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 4: Increase Your Testosterone

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to identify and increase your testosterone.

Brett provides us with nine ways to do this and all we have to do is focus on three today. For me, I will plan on focusing on the following:

1) Eat a serving of cruciferous vegetables - For those of you who do not know my typical lunch, this will not be a problem, as J-Mom always states that for lunch I eat rabbit food.

2) Do resistance training - This has been on my list for a while and I simply tend to put it off, so I guess the mantra is do not put off today what you have been in the past.

3) Meditate for at least 10 minutes - I am not always good at this, but will work on doing it today, as it is good to be able to clean the soul per se.

There are a few on the list that were no brainers for me, but also ones that I was surprised at such as:

Do not smoke at all today. I don't have to worry about this for I have never and will never touch smoking. I have seen too many people, friends and family effected by this adversely to even think about touching this.

Do no eat anything with soy in it. This one surprised me as I eat soy daily due to a food allergy - so I guess I am out of the running on this one.

Have morning sex (if you partner is willing, of course). This one is a fun one and one I would not have completely thought of as well.

I encourage you all to check out the full list to see what you can do. So what can you do to raise your testosterone today (that is if you want to).

Project 365 (202/365) - Our Future Rock Star

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Project 365 (201/365) - Now For a Little Wackiness

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 3: Find a Mentor

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to identify and contact a mentor.

What I like about this task is that he provides you with specific tasks to take in thinking about this and then implementing it for yourself.

For me, I have a number of people that I have come to see as informal professional mentors. I have never asked them formally to act in this role, and maybe I need to to really take the most out of the mentoring relationship.

Personally though I can say that I do not believe that I have a "mentor" per se that I turn to to let's say mentor me in how to be a father, outside of what I have experienced or spoken to my own father or father-in-law about. I should also mention that I do see my father and father-in=-law as mentors, though again I have never formally asked them to do this, but I learn from them daily and cherish the wisdom that they do provide me. For me, overall this will probably be the area where I need to focus for the day.

I believe for myself I will think about the task at hand in a two-fold manner:

1) Being a better father - finding a mentor or mentors who are truly the pillar of fatherhood and do what I can to try and emulate this.

2) Finding my spiritual center - I have been on a journey for some time to try and find my own spiritual center and I think this is only continuing. For me, this will be another focus area as I move through the day and beyond.

How about all of you? What areas do you need to work on in regards to finding your own mentor? What types of mentors do you have within your life currently and how do you maintain this relationship?

Look forward to hearing from you all!

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 2: Shine Your Shoes

Brett over at the Art of Manliness is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge. Today, he challenges all guys to take a moment to shine your shoes.

I know this may sound simple, but as I work in a professional environment, I have come to notice people's shoes. I mean have you ever noticed looking down at people's shoes as they stand or walk around a room? How do you feel about them if their shoes are pristine? How about if they are basically run down and scuffed up.

For some of you it may not make a difference, or you may not have dress shoes that need shining. What some of us are pledging is that if you don't have shoes to shine, shine someone elses shoes, you'll feel better once you did and you will have served someone along the way!

So take some time today and do what I am going to do, shine your shoes and make them shine till they glisten. You will not be disappointed and people will notice!

Project 365 (200/365) - No Longer the Month of Maying

Monday, June 1, 2009

Project 365 (199/365) - A Mothers Day Memory

30 Days to a Better Man-Day 1: Define Your Core Values

Ok, I know that I have been a bit sporadic lately and my camera and computer has been on the fritz so I haven't gotten pictures up, but Brett over at the Art of Man is having a 30 day challenge for all of us guys out there - to become a better man. I encourage all of you to check it out and take the pledge.

Day one requires you to define your core values, well your top five in order of importance. Wow! What a way to start the process of becoming a better man. Needless to say this took a bit of thought and pondering on my part as there are many things hat I strive to do on a daily basis, but what you think down to the core of my existence and the values that I hold dear, it is not as easy to pinpoint only five.

For me, in thinking about this I would have to say that my five are in order of importance:

1) Relationships

Both with family and friends. It is too easy to get caught up in the milieu of our daily lives and we forget what and who is important. I pledge to take the time necessary to be present and there for my family and friends, and work to make sure that I become an even better father, husband and friend to all.

2) Honesty

Lately I have come to realize how fleeting our time on this planet actually is and it really comes to fly in the face of this time to hold back and harbor grudges and resentment toward others. We must take advantage of the time that we have and be honest with those around us; and this includes being honest with myself at times as well.

3) Service

I am a huge proponent on service to others and I hope to be able to share this with others, including my family, but also my friends, and my professional and personal community. We are blessed to be given the gifts that we have, and we must share these gifts to serve others as best as we can.

4) Forgiveness

Following what I stated about honesty, I try to make sure that no matter what I do, I sleep with a light heart and place my burdens aside each night. This includes forgiving others for the deeds that they have done against me. We only live once, and we cannot live with a heavy heart if we are to live at all.

5) Education

For those of you that know me, this probably would not surprise you at all. As Education is my profession, I tend to live it and breathe it daily. Yet, when I say education, I wish to be a proponent of Education in all perspective. Personally, professionally, and for others. Life long education is important as if you are not learning something new every day, you are most likely in no small sense, dead.

So what are your top 5 Core Values? What do you hold most dear to your inner-workings?

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

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